It’s Tuesday and as much I try to prepare for tonight’s live Internet talk show, I still haven’t gotten into the swing of the thing. I know it takes time to get in the flow, but I am always trying to stretch myself to raise the bar. This journey started after looking into doing some local talk radio. I have done TV, but I hadn’t done radio before. I tell you: Good talk radio show hosts put in some hard work. Lots of energy is given to really get people to talk and to keep the flow going. I chose to get some practice in and to hone in on what I really want, what I like, what I want to offer and it’s hard to do that on someone else’s show which has their own distinct personality.

So, when my friend, PR guru Pam Perry told me about talkshoe. I checked them out and I gotta tell you. It’s a cool thing. I like the capability of being able to chat while the show is on. Think about how many times you’re watching some talk show and you hve a question or a comment for the host or for the guest. That feature sold me.

Evey week I ask people, ok women, bu guys are welcome what’s on your mind/what do you want to talk about. Then if I like and it fits my goal/vision (which is the same one I have here at dahgurl) of creating a safe, non-judgemental and real place for women to share, think, laugh and grow. I built the dahgurl site on colors that are representative of a coffee house. So I named the show chocolate chats because I love chocolate and if I was sitting around with some gurlfriends AND I had some chocolate, we could talk about anything.

This week’s topic is juicier than ever. I had some one approach me with the question related to infidelity/cheating and was told by a man that he has surprised himself, but the biggest surprise has been his wife and how she’s so uptight and uninterested in sex or even in being sexy to him. I just kinda shook my head. Of course, I immediately go into coach mode, problem solving mode and I say well has he talked to her/have they gotten counseling and his response through her was she blames me/says it’s unrealistic to think that we should have sex daily and she thinks it’s unfair that I want her to look a certain way. I knew where that was going and I’ve heard it too often. The men’s boxer and the granny bloomers are not what most men want to see their women in, not to mention the flanner pajamas or what I heard one guy say, “A Step away from a SpaceSuit.” I took a deep breath and decided to build a show around it. You know we are respectful over at chocolate chats and every one knows that God is never separated from my work, but truth and love reigns by His example and respect makes the difference.

Where did we go wrong in this relationship thing? Is marriage just so not en vogue? Do we need to talk about sex in order to know its purpose in our lives? I got some theories and I know you do too. So, tonight at 9:00 p.m. over at Talkshoe, grab some chocolate (or whatever floats your boat) and join us for Chocolate Chats.

My husband and I are both the oldest of three children and we have some special understandings of middle children. Since we have five kids, we figured that we were exempt from the middle child deal, but we may not be. The blessing in our family is the gender diversity. Our third child, Kiserian, is the diplomat, the go between person and different than our middle siblings, he doesn’t have to compete to be the oldest or to get the privileges of being the oldest. Family dynamics are a trip and I have learned a great deal as I am committed to raising my children as individuals. Someone once told me that they raised all of their children the same.I smiled, but I didn’t believe it. Every one is different and you change even as they’re changing. I give tribute to the child in our house who requires all of us to put a little love in our hearts. Comment on the post over at The Parenting Post today.