parenting
Grandparents, kids just don’t understand
As you all know, I have struggled with clutter for as long as I can remember. I have rallied my family at different seasons and in many cases, we get it together, but our lives are so transient that the “together” part doesn’t last long. Because we are in the midst of birthing, growing in many different areas, that I’ve had to make some tough decisions. The toughest for the past three weeks is whether or not to send my children to Michigan for the summer. Now, some of you are thinking, “Five kids. Gone for five to six weeks. Safe, loving environment. And the question is?” Well I get that, but the deal is I wanted them to get used to spending time where they live and I didn’t want to have to split them up (one family prefers the older kids and the other one is more understanding of the high energy toddler), juggle their schedules and put such a huge responsibility on our parents and extended family. The family was looking forward to it, but I was tripping.
For weeks, I’ve had a sitter in at least once a week full day, I hired a second assistant in my office (the first one was virtual and handled the web design, higher tech stuff) and at the end of the day, I still felt like I didn’t get anything done. DH and the book. The need to buy a new house now that we’re staying in Baltimore. The talk show (which if you haven’t downloaded, you need to download right now) and the management of the household (doctor/dentist/play dates). UGGH! It’s just too much. I’m throwing in the white flag. I surrender. I need a break!
So, come Monday, I am going back into the luggage jungle and I am going to pack up four of my five kids and driving them to Michigan for the next 5 to 6 weeks. (The oldest is staying here so that she can finish her “Purity in Life” training classes. Still discussing white dress).
Yup! The babies are going North for the Summer and all I can think about is all of the stuff I have to do to get them ready for the journey. It seems like everyone is falling apart. Younger son is acting like a “middle”child/complains about not having enough responsibility and then when given responsibility, he doesn’t want to take it. My youngest daughter is having problems with going to the bathroom, so she’s wearing good nites now and she’s had trouble with urinary tract infections for awhile (I’m calling the nutritionist and seeing what’s what). The baby is throwing things and attacking the other kids, which I know my parents are soo not having. My oldest son thinks my oldest daughter is lucky because she gets to be at home/hang out with her friends.
And to top this all off, my oldest daughter has totally tripped me into going to NYC for a Fall Out Boy concert (free, part of the Today Show concert series…and I am so not feeling Katie Couric) on my youngest daughter’s birthday (July 6th), so I am going to drive to Michigan/stay 2 days/wake up at 4am on July 5th and drive back to Baltimore (by myself because DH is not coming/has too much work to do) and we plan to be on a bus to NYC on the 5th, so that we can get to Rockerfeller Plaza in time. Am I friggin nuts? I tried to let this go, but “she’s such a good girl.” My mother even checked bus fares and told me “If you said you were going to do it, then you need to do it. I understand it’s not practical, but you can make it happen for the baby’s sake.” What? Did she just throw a guilt trip on me too?
Sorry, people. There is no vacation or break in this until say…the 8th or so…I’m agitated, frustrated, making lists, wanting to scream every minute, and then they want to lose video games from the library and say stuff like, “Well mommy, we don’t know when a week is up, so it’s not our fault that the fine was $25.” In my mind, my hand was around my 9 year old’s throat while people in the library, stood around and cheered me on, chatting “Mom Rule. Kids stink.”
After I snapped out of it and looked at him CRAZY, I said, “Will (Smith) got it all wrong. Kids just don’t understand.”
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Here I’ve been sitting a bit concerned with how I’m going to manage to get my 2 boys packed up to spend 4 days with their grandparents (and get over the guilt of letting them go even though its less than an hour away) and you’ve got your own whirlwind to conquer. I know it will all work out- and though I couldn’t recognize Fallout boy if they walked up to me and smacked me in the face, their music is some of my favorite for working out. Just know that taking her to this concert places you in an infinite “cool mom” status, I’m not sure that I could hang
Thanks, Yolanda. She’s a great kid, but I don’t know if I can hang either.
LOL. Hooonnnney, I do the same thing. Get all stressed out about sh*t before it even happened and work my self up into a sheer frenzy about schedules, little people, family, etc. Then one day I just said f*ck it, and said I know I’ve done what I’m supposed to do. And you know what, things work out just fine.
Of course I still have to teach my self to just breeeaaathe and “throw up both my hands” *marvin gaye voice*
Now Aly,
You better stop tapping my phone lines because I always trip before this journey and as I much I front like I’m not clingy and overprotective, I am VERY in tune with the spiritual challenges and needs of my kids as individuals. And our families ain’t kneeling at the bed at night, speaking in tongues, putting oil on pillows and door ways. Know what I’m saying? So I gotta war in the spirit from BMore. I’m hearing Marvin’s voice too with my hands up in the air.
Okay…my boys just came back from their two week jaunt to the country. They will be leaving again in a week for another week. This week, my husband took off from work to stay with them, under the impression that they would want to spend a week with their dear old dad. (We both work outside the home.)
This is the kicker! My children decided they didnt want to come home! Which, of course, elicited what I call a bad mommy moment. I wanted to know what in the world was soo incredibly bad about their home that they would want to stay away. I mean we are talking “well loved” boys here. And, do you know what it was? My sister was going to the pool the next day. “Cant we go home AFTER we go swimming.”
Yeah, imagine the visual picture running through my head!
But, my little angels were home yesterday–promptly asked, whats for dinner? and immediately ran outside for a neighborhood game of football.
Oh, me…how I loved my two week break.
PS…I’d take her to NY, too, no matter how crazy. Imagine looking back after she’s gone and remembering the memory. I’m all about making memories.