I often wonder do some of my children get more props, more blog time than others. When I was writing for the Parenting Post, I used to always take turns writing about each one of the children. Some of favorites, though, were about my younger son or technically, my middle child. Now, I’ve told you that I don’t like the title of “middle child” because that…that just sets you up for feeling torn, confused. So, instead of calling him the middle child or the younger boy, I’ve given him some nicknames that really match his personality like Old Soul, Love Machine, YPW (young prayer warrior), or the latest is Lil Man (remember earlier this week, he’s the one who has the style of walking around topless). He has always had this calm, helpful, laid-back personality. It’s been a wonderful contrast to my strong headed oldest son. I’ve always counted on him to go with the flow, not argue, n0t complain. But recently, all of this has changed and I don’t know how to handle it.

Sometimes as parents we can pinpoint a situation, an issue that may cause our children to change their outlook on life. For my oldest daughter, she had a couple of bully incidents which made her strengthen her confidence and learn to “be quiet and watch” and not assume that everyone is going to be friendly to you. My oldest son is just overall cautious, insightful and not easily influenced and I don’t expect him to change much. But with Kiserian? I just don’t know what happen. It’s like a full moon or his under arm odor (he doesn’t like baths or showers because they take too long and he doesn’t do a good job (since I often have to send him back because he left soap somewhere), so why bother?) has caused his personality to shift. He speaks up about what he doesn’t want, what he doesn’t like; he talks back to me and questions the decisions that I make; he is defiant and doesn’t want to listen to his siblings for help, for guidance, for anything. I just don’t know what to do other than yell, punish him, tell him that this is out of character and I want him to really think about his actions. He’s crying all of the time, throwing tantrums like he’s 3 year olds. Somebody, anybody, help a mama out, please!

Of course, I consulted DH, wondering if I should get him some counseling or something (hey, I am so pro-therapy for any and all…matter of fact, we need to include therapy in our universal health care plan) and DH, as always, thinks I’m overreacting. “He’s just getting older. He’s growing up, finding his way. Leave him alone and let him grow. ” So, what I heard was, “You got the problem, not him. Stop trying to hold on to his current characteristics. He’s only 7. We still don’t know who he really is. Let him find out and we just love him through it.” WHAT? I can’t take change…household dynamics are already in flux with a sorta grumpy teenager (she’s changing, you know), a bossy/tricky 4 year old girl (she’ll be 5 on Friday…I’ll tell you about her celebration then), a 9 year old who is reading everything he can get his hands on , but needs to develop some personal interaction skills and use his big brother status for good and not evil…did I mention a toddler who is throwing everything that’s not stuck to the ground?

I need stability. Lil Man was my stability. I could always count on him to bring in the love, bring in the peace. I’m praying that this phase doesn’t last long and that I can go back to something that I know…but chances of that are happening…next to impossible.

Are you experiencing some growing pains in your house? Have aliens invaded the bodies of your sweet, innocent ones and turned them into…children? How did you handle it? Did you go off the deep end like me or are hiding in a corner scared to face it? Share your story because sistah needs some help.